photo by @andreadabene
Literally all my dreams for all my life. What do you desire?
You can manifest your perfect partner, did you know that?
If you dreamed of getting married when you were little, the qualities you favored in a person (e.g. Honor, gentleness, being around, not yelling or putting too many rules on you aka being like your dad, NOT being like your dad) at that age probably still hold up, you're still looking for this.
Why? Because kids are intuitive, they haven't accumulated decades worth of ego and fear. You see what matters most to you, and what your true desire is.
So in a way you and I always been manifesting our partners, calling them to us, but didn't know. Your perfect partner is looking for you, just as hard and with just as much frustration as you have faced when things didn't work out.
On some level you have always known you deserve better...
Every time a relationship would turn into turmoil, doesn't matter whose fault it was, I would dream of a "movie" relationship free of the lying, cheating, addiction, codependency, and unexpressed hurt (aka anger) and caretaking all my other relationships seemed to require.
My self-worth issues told me this wasn't possible. The dysfunctional relationships that surrounded me told me not to get my hopes up.
Practicing holding onto a vision and not accepting less is the difference between fantasizing and manifesting, not much more.
Set standards and take inspiration from anywhere. Like @andreadabene.
Allow yourself to dream and fantasize, like you were a kid again. Be romantic, have high hopes, hold out! Hook up with people you like, but don't get tied down. If you're with the wrong person, the right person cannot find you. Dream your little life away. Don't limit yourself or shit on your ideas. You want a tree house and three kids with berries all over their faces? Great. Make a mental note that you wan an available man who wants to procreate and isn't a complete pussy about being outdoors. This is stuff you need to know so you stop settling, and it's fun!
Again. If you are letting someone who is not up to your standards take up all your time, you will not be available for your perfect partner to find you. If you're not happy, haven't been happy, know you should probably go but are scared it's the best it's going to get? You're settling. Go get more.
Breakup regrets? No. They weren't right for you and you weren't right for them. Thank god you both stepped out of the way.
Now: What dark patterns of relationships last were your fault, and do you plan on bringing them into your life partnership? Good time to quit smoking, stop doing blow, start sleeping more, stop going through phones or looking up exes on IG, whatever. How can you love yourself more.
I trust I'm worth unconditional love for the first time in my life, I'm holding out for the the real deal and I have a whole lot of issues from all my relationships and I certainly don't want to bring them into my life partnership, so i'm cleaning them up now. By getting clear on what my standards are, I know what work I need I do for myself before I can even handle a Mature Adult Man. I'm clearing up some ancient issues, like the text thing: "do I need a guy that texts me all the time or do I need to be the kind of woman who doesn't need constant validation from texts?".
"Do I need to lose 10lbs to look as hot as possible for when My Husband gets here or do I need to stop thinking anyone besides my ego cares about ten pounds of adipose cells when I am a magnificent Spirit made up of space material and I have awareness, and a great ass."
Manifesting your partner is serious work, I'm not saying this is @andreadabene 's relationship, just that I require the kind of man who is down to adventure with me always and I won't settle for less. I'm worth it , and I become more worth it the weirder I get.
They're looking for you as long as you've been looking for them. Do YOUR work, and trust that every time you honor your true self
I woke up at 6AM I haven't brushed my teeth or peed because I have to tell you this right now. It cannot wait. If I don't tell you this, NOW, my life is meaningless.
If you're on your period right now, with me, celebrate! You're synced up with the full moon (in Sagittarius. What does that mean? Hit the pic to hear what my personal favorite astrologer has to say on it) .
We've gotten pretty used to our periods, although it doesn't make them easier. We have all kinds of gadgets, pills, hot water bottles, even special underwear designed exactly for this time of the month. All designed so we can try to live like our periods aren't really happening.
I used to hear stories of ancient cultures, and contemporary ones ( as a long time Brooklyn resident, I've heard the endless speculation on what exactly goes on behind the closed doors of the Hasidic Jews of Williamsburg) where they "banished" women during their cycle, and they were "forced" to go hang out with other women who were menstruating at the same time. They weren't permitted to have sex, someone else would have to prepare the food, and they were "forced" to take ritual baths and immerse themselves in prayer.
Naturally my propensity for outrage and sense of separation from all people didn't allow me to see this for what it is. I saw a week of shame and ostracizing, women walking off to the shame cave, heads hanging low.
yeah right! These women may not have shown it, but they're probably cackling like hyenas! No sex, cleaning, or hanging out with anyone who cannot directly empathize with your period cramps, angst, and cravings? Bring it on. Also what's more shameful, the whole world knowing you're on your period at the period house with the other hens, or forcing yourself to show up in the world a week out of the month as if nothing is happening?
The company of women is profoundly healing and not to be missed. It's no longer cute to "I just prefer hanging out with guys" . A woman without women friends is a woman who has a lot of work to do.
According to Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes, during your period the wall between the conscious and the subconscious is made very very thin. This is why you're so sensitive. Your intuition is at its strongest. The doors of perception are cracked for you, begging you to push them wide open. Your menses bring fertility, of the mind and the body. It's the perfect time to workshop a new idea. Logic is the enemy, logic bullies intuition. Be with people who support you, who understand you, and who can hold a dream for you without shitting all over it, with a "don't quit your day job, get back to work." .
A full moon, like a menstrual cycle, is a time of manifesting and release. It brings fertility of mind and body. What have you learned since your last cycle? What are you having a hard time ignoring? What is it that you desire?
Instead of trying to operate independently of your cycle, and hide it, how can you celebrate it? How can you treat it as D-Day for that self-care week you've been wanting to tackle? How can you lasso this fertility and use it to bring one of your more intuitive projects to light? How can you spend more time with women? How can you release what doesn't serve? How can you be generous with yourself? How can you love on yourself even when you're scrubbing a diva cup emergency out of your jeans? How can you celebrate your Divine Femininity during this time?
Generosity. Forgiveness. Letting go.
This full moon is about your strength. If you're bleeding at this time, acknowledge it! Be proud of it. You are woman, guts and glory. With positive reinforcement and a whole lot of honor, you can accomplish anything. It's easy for you to find what's meaningful to you on a deeper level at this time, so go deep, but bring something back to the surface with you.
precious imperfections — My favorite blanket that I bought in Hungary became a casualty of some spiritual cleaning I was engrossed in, and a little piece of burning sage went right through the wool.
I felt like all I could see was that this blanket had been ruined I felt like I wasn't going to ever love it as much again. Truthfully it was a hole so small no one else would've never noticed it, but I was stuck on it.
The areas in your life that you're hard on yourself are a roadmap for you. The same as if you were really into bodybuilding and you notice that maybe your calves weren't really where you wanted them to be, you would start working them out more. If you have a soft spot that's making you feel insecure that showing you exactly where you need to put some more love.
What needs to be forgiven for this healing to occur. What needs to be accepted? What needs to be reinforced?
As I "embroidered" (first time attempt here) a flower over the little hole I thought about how I do this in my own life.
What is a small flaw of mine I'm holding against myself? What little thing that no one else can see do I think is keeping me from being a whole person and how can I resolve that? How can I bring more love here?
what hurt of mine needs love? What little thing do I think is keeping me from being whole? What flaw do I think others are judging me on? How can I accept this, make it precious, and come to love myself even more BECAUSE of my flaws. In Japanese kintsukuroi , they repair smashed ceramics with gold to celebrate the story of healing. It becomes more beautiful, more lovable because of the flaws.
What special attention does your story need? Can you sit down and spend some
time with it? Can you assess how it came to be, and energetically start to patch it up with love? Can it become your favorite part about yourself? It's worth a try... Right?
Loving you from here...
A lot of times it can be overwhelming when we think about what we're trying to accomplish.
I went to see The Revenant last night with a friend of mine...Which resulted in us talking about Titanic, obviously.
Did you know that Kate Winslet was turned down for her role as Rose, several times!
There are two wolves in the room, whichever one you feed will grow bigger...